Tag: writing

On Why I Continue to Write

On By Steven D'AdamoIn On StorytellingLeave a comment

Existential dread for writing is real, as it probably is for any creative pursuit, honestly.

I often find myself asking “why” I write, why I continue to believe this is something I should be spending my time and energy on. This question doesn’t normally come as an emotional response, as in how can I go on writing? Who even wants to read my stories? It’s a matter of objective reasoning — existentialist — as in, what’s the use in writing if I’m not aggressively pursuing bestseller lists or millions of readers or international fame. Why am I persisting with this?

I think it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the doubtful voices in your head, so arming yourself with a litany of reasons to keep writing can be helpful when those doubts start to creep in.

For me, in the current moment, the doubt stems not from a lack of desire to write, or even a lack of stories I feel I want to tell, but from the extremely limited time I can spend writing day-to-day, or week-to-week.

Even now, I write this blog post at 11pm, after one long day of work, on the cusp of another, when I should be in bed trying to capture the rest of which I am so often in want. My wife sleeps in our bed across the room from me, as does Teddy, our Jack Russell who loves nothing more than to curl up between us.

In this moment, I’m writing in spite of the things I should rather be spending my time on. At least, that’s what the doubtful voices in my are telling me.

Writing stories is a lot harder than writing blogs, and, as my monthly goals posts will attest, it has become even more difficult for me to find either the time or the mental space to write stories, of late.

So naturally, I’ve begun to question whether it’s worth the effort, the pressure I still put on myself to write.

My conclusion, for now, is that it is. When I was writing my first novel, I felt an urgent need to finish and publish that story. My goal at the time was to publish my first book before I turned 30, and I achieved that with less than two months to spare.

Now, I feel the need to continue to tell stories, but not on any particular timeline. So, for the current moment, I’m writing because I feel as though I should tell the stories in my head, for whoever ends up reading them.

What that means when it comes to publishing them, I’m not sure. They will be published, but the purpose and form of that is more nebulous than it used to be, and I’m okay with that. In some ways, the writing is the point, at least for right now.

Steve D

February Write Day: Resetting Expectations

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On StorytellingLeave a comment

January has been a full month. I’m taking an online noncredit course for work, and I had underestimated the amount of mental energy it would require from me, on top of my day job.

Last Month’s Goal

  1. Read three books.
  2. Exercise at least every other day and get back to the gym.
  3. Finish current round of revisions for New Earth.
  4. Outline New Earth for chapter structure.
  5. Begin revisions based on character notes.

Let’s get to the reviewing.

Read three books?

No. I finished one book in January, although I made progress on two others.

I sort of don’t know what to do with the current book I’m listening on audiobook: Black Leopard, Red Wolf. The world is more detailed than anything I’ve ever read. The characters are intimate and unique. And yet, one-third of the way through the book, I’m just starting to grasp where this story is headed. This book is 24 hours of listening time in audio format, and it’s taken me nearly eight hours to understand the plot.

Maybe audiobook is the wrong format to read this book. I intend to finish it, but I have been stalled by snail’s pace of a plot on this one. What kills me is that this is an incredibly well-written book. I really want to like it. So, I’m hoping it will start to pick up in the second act.

Exercise every other day and get back to the gym?

Almost. I exercised 11 days in January, but I did not make it to the gym. My challenge at the moment is finding the right time of day to work out, and making that part of my routine.

When I was last going to the gym regularly, about four years ago now, I had access to a really nice gym in the office where I worked. This allowed me to work out during my lunch breaks. Once I left that job, I had to reset my routine to work out in the evenings at a local gym.

When I stopped going to my local gym — circa 2020, no idea why… — I never went back. So now, I’m in this space where on any given day, I know I should exercise, but I find it difficult to a) tear myself away from work, even though I mostly work from home, b) tear myself away from family obligations in the evenings, or c) motivate to go to the gym later at night once the kids are in bed.

So, I’m still trying to find that balance. I think it may end up being a mixed bag of short workouts on weekday afternoons, and one or two longer gym workouts at night or on the weekends.

Finish current round of revisions for New Earth?

Technically, yes!

Because I never wrote an ending to this story, and somehow forgot about that fact. I need to finish the ending, and then I can call this done.

Outline this story for chapter structure, and revise based on character sheets?

No, and no. See above.

Goals for February

I have some catching up to do in February. My online course will continue through this month, so now that I know what the course load really looks like, I should be able to work around it better.

I started a new thing last week. Weekly goals for my personal life. I track weekly goals for work as a running to-do list, so I thought I might as well try that in my home life as well. I’m starting with pretty basic things, but being able to check things off throughout the week is good.

Incidentally, most of my personal weekly goals are related to my monthly goals. I don’t intend to publish them here regularly, but perhaps I’ll talk about them now and then.

The point is, I’m hoping this will help me stay focused on the things that are important to me, sort of a self-care checklist.

  1. Read 3 books. I’m actually not sure how I’m going to achieve this in February. I will likely not finish Black Leopard, Red Wolf this month, unless it becomes extremely compelling soon. I can probably finish my current nonfiction paperback read, and I may need to find a couple of shorter reads to fill the gaps in between.
  2. Exercise every other day and get to the gym. Same as last month, just trying to establish that routine.
  3. Finish ending for New Earth. I know how I want to tie off this story. I just need to sit down and do it. I’m honestly out of practice for long writing sessions, what with my focus on revisions this past year.
  4. Outline New Earth for chapter structure. Same.

Steve D

January Write Day: Continue Down the Path

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On LifeLeave a comment

December was crazy, as should have been expected. We had a great holiday season, even if it was busier than we intended. I’m also coming into January busier than intended – new hire at work, new class starting this week, new projects to work on at home…

It already feels like a lot, so I’m just trying to stay focused on what’s in front of me each day.

Last Month’s Goals

  1. Read three books.
  2. Exercise at least every other day and go to the gym more than once per week.
  3. Finish current round of revisions for New Earth.
  4. Create character sheets with physical descriptions/clothes for main characters.
  5. Outline New Earth for chapter structure.

Ahhhh, the optimism of a new month. Let’s get this over with.

Read three books?

I finished one book and made some headway on two others. We had busy weekends leading up to the holidays, and I generally don’t bore my family with my audiobook choices in the car, unless they’re all asleep.

I’ve taken an unintended hiatus from Black Leopard, Red Wolf. I’m enjoying the story, and it feels like it’s really moving now after several chapters of… prelude? It’s just an incredibly heavy book, in tone, style, content, and detail. This is not the type of book I can zone out for, so I’m only inclined to listen to it when I can really focus.

I still managed to achieve my GoodReads challenge of reading 26 books, and I feel like I can do more. I’m aiming for 30 in 2024. I’ll also do a recap of my GoodReads list for 2023 this month.

Exercise and go to the gym?

Not really. A little bit. I only went to the gym once, and I did just enough yoga at home to not feel like total crap. The holiday season has always been tough for me maintaining an exercise routine, because of travel, and because of my desire to be lazy and cozy at home.

Finish current revisions?

Not quite. I had a little bit more to complete in New Earth than I had anticipated, and I was also lazy in December. I’m nearly done, though, and I’m still really enjoying the way this story has turned out. More revision phases will be needed, but it’s coming together.

Create character sheets?

In a way. Rather than creating individual documents or sections for each character, I used an existing reference. I had laid out a basic family tree for the clan at the center of my story in a spreadsheet. Each character’s role in the clan is absolutely a part of their characters, so it made sense to use that format as the basis for character sheets. Each character has their own cell in the spreadsheet, so I just added a note to each cell. The information is readily accessible, but it doesn’t take a lot of time for me to sift through.

I created the character sheet template for each character and filled out the details I knew offhand. What I now need to do is find references to other character details in my stories, record them in the character notes, and then do another round of revisions for those (and other) details across both stories.

Outline New Earth for chapter structure?

Nope. I’ll aim to do this after I finish this round of revisions.

Goals for January

  1. Read three books.
  2. Exercise at least every other day and get back to the gym.
  3. Finish current round of revisions for New Earth.
  4. Outline New Earth for chapter structure.
  5. Begin revisions based on character notes.

So pretty similar to last month, but I still feel alright with where I’m at. Work in progress, as always.

Steve D

Creativity Sessions writing process. Evening Satellite Publishing.

Character Sheet Template: My POV Character’s Details

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On StorytellingLeave a comment

Earlier the month, I discussed my current task to create character sheets for the main characters in my duology of novellas, Uprooted and New Earth. My goal with these is to fill out the flourishes of detail that I skimmed over when first writing these stories, to ensure my characters feel distinct from each other and can each be described consistently.

In that previous post, I listed what I thought would be useful details for me to pin down for each of my main characters. Because these stories deal with family trauma for a clan of extended family, there are a lot of characters. Not all of them will be as fleshed out as others, because some are more side characters.

What I ended up doing was using a basic character template for each member of the clan, and then trimmed it down based on how frequent or significant that character’s appearances are throughout the stories.

For today, I wanted to share the full character template for my primary, point-of-view character: Mikaela.

Character Sheet: Mikaela

Logline: “After her village is attacked, a woman must do everything she can to protect her family.”

Age: 29

Occupation/role: Herbalist and healer; Married to the clan leader with two children; caretaker for her mother-in-law

Physical: I actually don’t have a great description of Mikaela’s physical appearance, because she’s the POV character – it would be odd for her to describe herself, but I should be able to work in a few details naturally, such as the texture/length of her hair.

Clothing: A dagger made from a particular type of stone she wears around her neck tied with a leather cord. This was given to her by her husband as a wedding gift. This type of stone is rare, so this is a precious gift both in its value and its utility for Mikaela as an herbalist.

  • I’d also like to add one or two small details about the clothes Mikaela wears, so I will need to include those in my stories.

How Mikaela…

Thinks/feels about her life in her village: Mikaela likes her village, loves her clan relatives, and especially her clan-sisters, and believes they have everything they need to raise their children. She wishes she had some connection to her mother other than the herbalism Mikaela learned from her. She has not seen her own parents since she was married off to her husband and left the village she grew up in.

Gestures: sighs of exasperation; bites her bottom lip when deep in thought or anxious

What she wants: to raise her son to be a kind man like his father; to raise her daughter to be resilient and to pass her knowledge of herbs and healing onto her

What motivates her: Providing for her children and the rest of their family

What she fears: losing her family – Her husband or son getting killed in the hunt or a raid, her daughter being married off to a different village, never to see her mother again

Filling in the Gaps

As you can see, I have a couple of gaps to fill in for Mikaela’s character sheet, particularly in her clothing and appearance. Because she’s my main character, I wanted her character sheet to be the most detailed, but most of this information came naturally as I was writing.

I will not be going into this level of detail for every character. Even the four or five primary characters around Mikaela will not have this much detail, and the secondary and tertiary characters even less.

In any case, I’m looking forward to completing these and filling in the gaps in my writing as part of my ongoing revision process.

Let me know what you think. Would you take a different approach to character sheets?

Steve D

Creativity Sessions writing process. Evening Satellite Publishing.

My Character Sheet Template

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Creativity Sessions, On StorytellingLeave a comment

One of my goals for this month is to create character sheets for the main characters in my duology, Uprooted and New Earth. I’ve already gone through multiple drafts and revisions for each of these novellas, so why am I doing character sheets now?

Because I didn’t do them initially, and my early drafts of these stories were heavily focused on plot and dialogue, rather than characters. Going into writing Uprooted, the first of this duology, I had a basic idea of who my characters were and how the plot would unfold with them, but not much else. I was focused more on telling the story rather than adding the flourishes of detail that make it feel alive.

Now, I want to go back and make sure that living detail comes off the page. These stories are snapshots of a family dealing with trauma — there are a lot of names and a lot of moving pieces. So, I want the main characters to feel distinct, each with their own expressions, clothes, gestures, and opinions.

I also don’t want to entirely rewrite my story around these details, so I need to work backwards a little bit. I’ll design my character sheet templates, fill in whatever information I already have for each character from what’s already written, and then fill in the blanks.

You can find tons of character sheet templates online, so I’m creating one that fits my fairly specific purpose of retrofitting some details onto established characters. Here’s where I’ll start.

Character Sheet Template

  • The basics: Name, age, role in the family/clan (family roles are vital in these stories)
  • Logline: Something I always write for my major characters — the single sentence that captures what the character is trying to achieve and what stands in their way.
  • Physical description: the details missing for a lot of my characters. I’ll likely stick to 2-4 simple details, such as distinct facial features or posture.
  • Clothing: This family is from a small village, so their dress won’t differ too much. What can standout: head scarves. Children in this society wear particular styles of headscarves until they come of age. Adults then wear these headscarves differently, depending on their role in the family. This is a crucial detail that I want to ensure feels authentic.
  • Personality: How the characters thinks, feels, reacts.
  • What the character wants
  • What the character fears

I could probably go into even more depth, but I don’t want to overload myself for this month. I’m not even sure how many characters I will ultimately create sheets for – likely six, at the least. Perhaps I can create full character sheets for my mains, and slimmed-down versions for more side characters.

I’ll see how much effort this takes me, and, I just may share a couple of the characters’ details later on.

Steve D

December Write Day: Finishing Slightly Stronger

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On PublishingLeave a comment

November was a long month, and only partially in a good way. Obviously, the start of the holidays and the chance to see some family was great. It was also very busy for me at work, which took a lot of the mental capacity I might have otherwise had to do things I’d like to do at home. Also, our entire family has been sick to some degree over the last three or four weeks.

So, as you may have been able to tell by the extra haiku I posted in November, rather than writing full posts, some of my goals went less than well.

Last Month’s Goals

  1. Read three books.
  2. Exercise every day and go to the gym twice per week.
  3. Write long-form at least 10 days.

Read three books?

Nope. I’ve finished one book and made progress on two others. I started listening to Black leopard, Red Wolf by Marlon James on Audible, and it’s taking me longer to get into than I anticipated. I’m on chapter five, and I feel like I’m just beginning to understand what this story is actually like. I’m definitely going to continue reading it. It’s just taking me a bit longer to sink my teeth into.

I’ll probably end up picking away at other books during December in between chapters, just to stay on top of my reading goal. I need to finish one more book in December to meet my Goodreads goal of reading 26 books this year. I’m going to go out on a limb and say I will not finish Black leopard, Red Wolf this month, so I’ll finish something else to hit that mark.

Set my exercise/gym routine?

Also no. Again, busy month, and then getting sick did little to help my gym efforts. I feel like I’ve mostly been drained on energy the last few weeks, and I’m just now starting to feel normal again. I’m back on a more regular exercise routine now, but it’s been mostly yoga. I’m hoping to get back to the gym this week.

Write long-form at least 10 days?

No, and honestly, this goal was partially hurt by me not having the time/energy to write long-form blogs for a couple weeks. I definitely didn’t spend enough time revising New Earth, but I also just didn’t spend enough time writing or reading period in November.

I’m now nearly finished with this round of revisions for New Earth, and I’d like to have more specific goals for my revisions going forward. I’ll expand on that next.

Goals for December

  1. Read three books. Probably in the form of shorter novels.
  2. Exercise at least every other day and go to the gym more than once per week. I’m backing off last month’s goal a bit just to give myself some space during the holidays. Note that I’m saying go to the gym more than once per week. This basically means I want to average more than one gym trip per week. If it ends up only being six total, that’s still a win.
  3. Finish current round of revisions for New Earth. This should be doable, since I only have 15 pages or so to go.
  4. Create character sheets with physical descriptions/clothes for main characters. This applies to both Uprooted and New Earth, which effectively have the same primary characters. I’ve tried to incorporate this tuff organically in my revisions, but I don’t want it to feel forced, and I don’t want it to be inconsistent. So I’m going to create character sheets based on what I have so far, expand on them, and then use those to inform how I describe these characters throughout both stories.
  5. Outline New Earth for chapter structure. This is something I did with Uprooted that helped me understand the overall plot flow better, and restructure chapters in ways that made sense for the story. I’ll do the same with New Earth.

Note that I’m not focused on writing a certain number of days this month. I have specific tasks I want to achieve, and everything else is bonus. It may be that this is still too much for me to achieve in one month, but it’s just a different tack. We’ll see how it goes.

Steve D

On FOUR LOST CITIES and Building this Fantasy Town

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On Storytelling, ReviewsLeave a comment

This post is not a real book review, at least, not entirely. I just finished listening to Four Lost Cities: A Secret History of the Urban Age by Annalee Newitz, and it got me thinking and rethinking the way I design and evolve cities in my fantasy universe.

A running theme in my world-building — and one of my pervading interests in history and anthropology — touches on the rise and fall of cities and civilizations. For years, I had the reductionist viewpoint that great cities rose and fell in linear patterns, and with clear markers for their demise.

When I learned that the far more common pattern is for cities (or civilizations) decay for years or decades or centuries before fading from prominence, I wanted to explore that in my storytelling.

Four Lost Cities provides a really interesting investigation into the formation and decline of cities across human history. Newitz uses archeological evidence to make the case that the evolution and dissolution of cities is not a linear path, that the very definition of a “city” and its growth are defined more by socio-cultural forces of its time than by rigid and often arbitrary models based solely on commerce.

What would this look like in a setting of my making? Would I be able to capture the uncertain rise and long decay of a city or a people in character-centric stories?

My current work-in-progress, the duology I’ve been referring to as The Herb Witch Tales, spawned from this theme. Before I knew who my characters were, I wanted to explore a city’s evolution from small port town, to sprawling tent camp of migrant settlers, to developed population center.

The story developed from the idea of the city, and I found characters to fit that initial blueprint. The duology is now much more grounded than that much broader idea, but I’ve tried to pay particular attention to the ways in which the characters perceive and interact with place — the places they’ve lost, left, or found.

Although The Herb Witch Tales is currently a duology, I can easily imagine future stories where the growth of this family is inextricably tied with the growth of the place they come to call home.

So, I must recommend Four Lost Cities, because it is informative, thought-provoking, and inspiring in a world-building kind of way.

Steve D

November Write Day: Autumn Swing

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On LifeLeave a comment

After a warm spell in Maryland, autumn returned just in time for Halloween, and we were able to really celebrate for the first time with our kids. Our new street put on an impressive display of Halloween decorations, and we joined in the fun. I also got to take the boys trick-or-treating for real for the first time. Our previous neighborhood never had many trick-or-treaters, and both boys were likely too young to really get into it. At five and two, they were excited to get candy, and we saw plenty of other families out and about.

October was a very strange month, but we had some fun at the Renaissance Festival, saw some family, and bought some much-needed furniture for our house.

Last Month’s Goals

  1. Read three books.
  2. Exercise every day.
  3. Write long-form at least 10 days.

Read three books?

Nope, and right after I said this was automatic for me. I finished one book in October, and I’ve made good progress on another. I decided to read another nonfiction book, and these always go more slowly for me. So, I definitely need to make more progress on my two current nonfiction reads:

I’m enjoying both books, I just tend to read/listen to them in smaller snatches, and it takes a bit more of my focus to follow along.

I’ll likely pick up at least one fiction story in November, although I haven’t decided whether I’m going to start another ambitious series yet.

Exercise every day?

More or less. My yoga flow made it fairly easy to exercise most days. I also finally signed up for a membership with the gym five minutes up the road. In two-plus weeks, I’ve gone three times, which isn’t bad. I’m currently aiming to go to the gym twice per week until I figure out my routine a bit more. What I know is that I want yoga to remain a part of my routine week in and week out, especially as a way to spell weight-lifting or more intense workouts.

Write long-form at least 10 days?

Nine days! I was so close, but we’ve had some busy weekends. I feel like I’ve made some good progress on my current work-in-progress, and I feel less stressed about what comes next. After deciding not too worry too much about Publishing and Marketing (capitals intended) my fantasy duology, I’m able to just focus on the revisions.

The good news is that, halfway through revising the second of these two novellas, I really like both stories. They need some work, but I’m enjoying re-reading them.

Goals for November

  1. Read three books. I should be able to do this once I’ve figured out my next reads.
  2. Exercise every day and go to the gym twice per week. I’m forming a loose routine at the gym, knowing that I’ll eventually need to go three or four times per week to make it impactful. For now, I just want to get back in the habit of going after a four-year hiatus.
  3. Write long-form at least 10 days. Again, this includes long-form blogs and my revisions, or anything else I end up writing that is not a haiku. I feel good about making this goal this month, and I’m not concerned with trying to increase it, what with Thanksgiving around the corner.

Steve D

Creativity Sessions writing process. Evening Satellite Publishing.

A Changing of the Writing Goals: Or a Reassessment

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On PublishingLeave a comment

In my October Write Day post, I started to ponder what my medium-term writing goals really were. I’ve been diligent about setting monthly goals for myself, just to ensure I’m focusing some of my energy on my hobbies, like writing.

I also know what my super-long-term goal is: I’d like to have multiple published stories that I can take to conventions and book festivals. I want to actually meet people who may be interested in reading my stories, not just try to sell online.

My current work-in-progress, which I’ve generally referred to as “The Herb Witch Tales”, is a duology of novellas that I intend to publish as one volume in print, to keep printing costs down. My next intended project is the sequel to Warden of Everfeld: Memento, which will be a full-length novel. While I have a solid start on that novel I had started drafting in 2018, it will not be ready for publication quickly.

At the moment, I have one published book and a slew of online short stories that are not ready for print form. I definitely need more than one book in order to make paying for tables at conventions worth the cost.

But I’m also concerned about pushing to publish my current work-in-progress, doing a bunch of marketing, going to some conventions, and then not being able to publish anything for a few more years.

That doesn’t seem like an effective way to sell books. I also don’t want “final” drafts to languish on a hard drive somewhere without seeing the light of day.

So maybe that’s the answer. I’ll publish my current work-in-progress when it’s ready, not make a huge deal about it, and continue with my next project. Once I have three books to sell, then I can start to consider my proactive marketing and conventions.

It just may take a few more years to get there.

Do any other writers out there stuggle with this question? Do you feel pressure to publish every year?

Steve D

October Write Day: Steps

On By Steven D'AdamoIn Fantasy, On LifeLeave a comment

September was interesting. We spent a weekend at the beach, and both of our boys got their feet wet in the ocean for the first time. Work has been nuts for a variety of reasons, topped off by my best team member and good friend leaving for a new position. And we sold our old house!

It took me way too long to remember everything we did last month.

Last Month’s Goals

  1. Read three books.
  2. Exercise every day.
  3. Write long-form at least every other day.

Read three books?

Yes! I read three books in September by powering through the remaining three installments of The Last Kingdom series. I should have posted my review of the final book last week, but totally missed my regular post. I did not finish my current nonfiction read, but I’m picking away at it.

I’m on the lookout for my next big series, but I’m content to pick away at my current to-be-read list for the time being.

Exercise every day?

No, but I think I’ve still improved my routine. I haven’t yet gotten a new gym membership, so to ensure that I can do something each day, I’ve just started building my own yoga routine. It’s basically a full-body flow that takes me about 10 minutes, for now. I’m slowly building on it, adding moves as I see fit.

Because it’s my own routine, it’s really easy for me to just step away from desk for a few minutes and work through the flow a couple times. Once I get a gym membership, my plan is to use this yoga flow on my off days, just to stay loose.

Write long-form every other day?

No. I only worked on long-form writing on seven days. Missing my blog post last week didn’t help.

Overall, I feel motivated to continue picking away at my writing–the issue is finding and dedicating time to do so week in and week out.

What I’m really questioning is whether I have–or should have–any medium-term goals aside from just getting my current stories to final draft status. I had always assumed I would publish them when I had them ready, but then I look ahead to my next project, and I don’t see that being publishable for a few years at least. I’m at the point where I just have stories I want to write, and I know I can’t publish new stories every other year. Is it enough to publish once every six years? Or, should I put more energy into just writing.

I may be exploring this a bit more in a blog this month.

Goals for October

  1. Read three books. This is about as close to automatic as any goal can be for me.
  2. Exercise every day. I’m going to continue with my current yoga routine, since it’s been working out for me. I’m not sure when I’ll add something else to my routine at this point, but I’d like it to be soon.
  3. Write long-form at least 10 days. Yes, I’m scaling back my writing goal. I always try to be realistic about my goals, and I haven’t made a writing goal in I don’t know how long.

Steve D