Have I thought this through?
It’s all challenge, with no possible reward,
Leaving heart restless and mind sore –
I don’t know what I would
Consider winning given the score.
If it goes one way? It’s sinning.
But the alternative leaves me spinning
In ‘what I wish’s and ‘in another life’s,
Forever longing or forever damned.
I can’t decide which is worse.
All this misery and you’re the source.
Completely oblivious to my temptation,
Seems like a waste of deep contemplation,
‘Cause if you don’t know, it doesn’t matter.
I think I think too much
Of the consequences of
Actions I’ll never take,
And gestures you would forsake
My friendship in exchange for.