Tag: mental health

March Write Day: Fresh Start

On By Steven D'AdamoIn On LifeLeave a comment

Much has happened in the last month and a half which (mostly) explains my absence from this site. Primarily, I was laid off from my job last month and have been interviewing for a couple of new roles in the meantime. The family is doing well, and I’m confident I’ll land a new job soon.

And if not… we’ll see.

Being laid off, while not fun, presents an interesting opportunity. I had been burned out and overly stressed at my last job for quite some time. More than anything, I have felt relieved since leaving. It has given me a chance to think about all the things I haven’t had much brain space or time to pursue for the last year or so. Writing, music, exercise, community work, alternative career paths.

So, this Write Day post is a bit of a fresh start after this recent hiatus. I’m not going to bother with my last set of goals, which I posted before Thanksgiving. Instead, I’m going to outline where I’m at for the moment, and how I’d like for this interim period to go before I start a new job — whether that’s in two weeks or in two months.

Areas of Focus for the Time Being

Meditation

I’m attempting to meditate more regularly after not really doing much of it for several months. My current strategy includes two short sessions: the first to set my intention, focus on breathing, and clear my mind. The second is to allow for reflection, and I try to provide guidance to myself with a question or a challenge that’s ahead of me for the day.

Exercise

This has been a long-standing and under-achieved goal of mine for… too long. Now, with additional time on my hands, I’m taking the opportunity to just figure out what I want from an exercise routine. I know I need to exercise. I just need to do it in a way that is motivating and enjoyable.

For now, I’ve settled on alternating guided yoga flows with weight-lifting at the gym. The difference from my previous gym habits is that I’m designing a routine that assumes I only go to the gym about three times per week. As a twenty-something, weight-lifting had made up nearly the entirety of my exercise. Now, as a late-thirty-something, I want to focus on mobility and flexibility as much as strength, and I think I’ve come up with a basic routine to strike that balance.

Settling family care items

I’m not going into detail, but I’m in the midst of handling some financial changes for my dad. It’s been a long time in the making, and it will take quite a load off my shoulders once all is settled in the next few weeks. I would have been doing this even if I hadn’t been laid off. Now, I’m actually able to focus on it.

Community engagement

I need to get involved locally. I’ve had this burning drive to do so for the last year or more, fueled in equal parts by restlessness in my own world and rage at the state of the wider world. I’ve reached out to one local organization where I have a connection, and while they’re not seeking volunteers at the moment, I expect to get involved with them later this year.

Until then, I would like to put in some volunteer hours with another local organization. This will depend on when I start a potential new job, but I know that it will also keep me active and cure some of my restlessness.

Completing two home projects

I need to build some damn shelves in my shed, and I need to install a double-end bag so I can get back into some boxing training (part of my ideal exercise routine). Each project should only take a couple hours, so I’m hoping to have one done tomorrow or Friday.

Plotting the best course for writing

I’ve been thinking a lot about my writing: why I want to write, what I want to get from it, whether and how I want to publish. The bones of a plan have begun to take shape in my mind. I think I know which stories I want to focus on — largely the same ones I had been.

I think I also now know how I want to go about publishing. Primarily, I want to do it myself, not just in the self-publisher print-on-demand way, but in sourcing more dedicated printing services to stay off the big platforms. I don’t know what exactly this will look like, or even when I will be able to put real time into it, but one thing is certain. I know that this idea feels good, and that’s enough for me.

Fresh Start

This post ended up being quite a bit longer than I anticipated, but I suppose it was overdue. I definitely want to get back to posting here regularly. I have a backlog of book reviews to publish, and I haven’t written a haiku in weeks.

That’s it for now, though.

Steve D

November Write Day: Mentality

On By Steven D'AdamoIn On LifeLeave a comment

October was an improvement over previous months. Not necessarily for my goals. More for my overall mental health. By taking some pressure off myself and refocusing on my immediate priorities, I feel like I had room to breathe in October, even if that meant backing away from my usual goal-seeking.

Last Month’s Goals

  1. Read three books.
  2. All the routines.

Read three books?

I completed two reads in October: A Curse of Krakens, which I loved and reviewed here, and A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms, one of George R.R. Martin’s off-shoot stories from world of A Song of Ice and Fire. I also reviewed that one, here.

I ended up powering through A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms during our beach weekend in early October, which already feels like ages ago. Sitting on the beach while the boys played in the sand for a few hours was solid reading time.

I’ve also been working through A World of Ice and Fire, the encyclopedic history of Martin’s fantasy world, partly because I really enjoyed Knight, and partly because I wanted to arm myself with knowledge prior to watching House of the Dragon season 2. Season 1 was so grim that I don’t care about spoilers. I wanted to know the highlights of the Dance of the Dragons so I wasn’t shocked with whatever happened this season. I haven’t watched it yet, but I’m still working my way through the encyclopedia anyway.

I’m hoping it will actually provide some inspiration for my own fantasy world-building at some point.

All the routines?

I feel good with where I landed in October. I exercised a bit and set some goals to achieve by the end of the year — simple ones, like “go to the gym x times”. I had a much-needed vacation with just my wife and sons at the beach. I did some writing for the first time in a couple months.

Goals for November (even though we’re halfway through)

  1. Read three books.
    • Current reads: A World of Ice and Fire, by George R.R. Martin, that encyclopedic history I mentioned. I doubt I will actually finish it this month. It’s a doozy. I also have barely started Behind You is the Sea, by Susan Muaddi Darraj.
    • Likely next reads: I’m still on the hunt for my next fantasy series. A family member recently recommended N.K. Jemisin.
  2. All the routines, but more. I have a couple soft exercise goals for this year, really just to be more deliberate about working out and go to the gym more often than I have been. I don’t have any hard and fast writing goals, but I’m thinking about it more, which is a step in the right direction. With the holidays coming up, I just don’t want to fall off a cliff again.

Steve D

October Write Day: The Lost Routine

On By Steven D'AdamoIn On StorytellingLeave a comment

September was crazy busy. Between our kindergartener starting school, some big family events, and work, I didn’t have time for much else. I basically fell off of every single routine I had, aside from work and family pick-up/drop-off.

I just realized that I didn’t even post a September Write Day post in September. I posted five haiku total, where I might have posted 10 times over the course of the month, including longer-form posts.

Anyway, I’m not trying to beat myself up. I’m just coming to the realization that an entire month of life has passed me by.

Last Month’s Goals (…meaning from August)

  1. Read three books.
  2. Plan for/test a writing routine.
  3. Figure out my next writing steps.

So that’s where I left off a full two months ago. I guess I’ll speak to each point, but not in terms of what I achieved. I need to allow myself space to reset.

Reading

I read during September, just not as much as I had hoped. I’ve completed A Curse of Krakens, which rounds out Kevin Hearne’s Seven Kennings trilogy that I’ve been working through. I really want to write a review, and likely one other post, about that one.

I also finished reading The Storyteller: Tales of Life and Music by Dave Grohl, which I really enjoyed. Not the type of book I’m interested in reviewing, though.

Writing things

In August, before all of my routines disappeared, I had started to write/revise the first part of my duology. This wasn’t with incredible consistency or progress, but I had started tracking how much content I was able to write/revise in a short session, usually 15-30 minutes. The idea was to see how I could progress and increase my writing time each month, without necessarily chasing a specific word count goal.

I haven’t done any writing in weeks. Now that we’ve ironed out our home routine a bit better, I feel like I’ll be able to put a bit more attention to it, but it will still just be an effort to see what I can accomplish for now.

Goals for October

  1. Read three books.
    • Current reads: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms, by George R.R. Martin, which has been on my shelf for a few years, and An Afro-Indigenous History of the United States by Kyle T. Mays, an historical essay that’s been in my Audible library for a while, too.
    • Likely next reads: I don’t know. I’m on the hunt for my next big fantasy series.
  2. All the routines. With our new pick-up/drop-off schedule that takes some pressure off my workday, I’m thinking about where I can fit in the things that I tend to put aside for family and work: exercise, writing, music. I have ideas for each. This has been the first week on our new schedule, so I’m still adjusting. Overall, I just want to get back to life in a way that I haven’t been mentally available for the past several weeks.

Steve D

Friday Write-Day: What a Week

On By Steven D'AdamoIn On Storytelling, Writers - Steve D'AdamoLeave a comment

Apologies for the delayed posting. As I mentioned last week, I was out of town for a work conference for three days this week.

I had a great time and enjoyed meeting a lot of my colleagues, but it was a bit of a whirlwind week. Continue reading “Friday Write-Day: What a Week” →