I’m running on caffeine,
And bleeding whiskey.
My behavior is getting risky,
Will you miss me,
When I’m gone?

Sleeping is fleeting,
Insomnia ever creeping,
Daylight same as night,
Dreams seeping,
Into my waking hours.
Under the power,
Of grief, I cower.

My waking hours,
Powerfully soured,
Bittered with lies,
A disguise tasting
Of poisons.

When my closest,
Don’t notice,
Why bother to fight?
Walk towards the light,
So I can be blind,
To all that’s keeping
Me awake at night.

I’m running on caffeine,
And bleeding whiskey.
My behavior is getting risky,
Will you miss me,
When I’m gone?
Listen to my swan song:

My favorite vices,
Are keeping me sane.
My favorite addictions,
Are helping me maintain,
The status quo of life’s game.
So I pretend to be the same…
But I’m not.
And it feels like I’m starting to rot,
From the inside out.

Jessie Gutierrez